Fan meets Fullmetal
by Yikie
Summary: All she did was open her Fullmetal Alchemist pocket watch merchandise she bought that day, who would’ve thought it would ‘transmute’ her into an unfamiliar world? Wait… unfamiliar? No, it’s strangely familiar, too familiar for god’s sake…
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Fullmetal Alchemist and it's characters (c) Hiromu Arakawa. The fangirl appearing in this fic, however, is my brainchild ^^'.**

_A/N: Hi everyone! I'm Yikie and this is my first attempt to write a fanfiction and English isn't my first language so... I hope it's not too badly written *sweatdrop*_

_I know this is rather short, but if there's at least one person who finds this interesting, I'll update as soon as possible! _

*****************************************************************************************************************************************************

All she did was open her _Fullmetal Alchemist_ pocket watch merchandise she bought that day, who would've thought it would 'transmute' her into an unfamiliar world? Wait… unfamiliar? No, it's strangely familiar, too familiar for god's sake… this…could this be…?

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU!?" Yet, a strangely-familiar-voice interrupted her thoughts. The girl turned around…

_NO WAY!!! _A boy with blond braided hair, wearing a red coat, a pair of leather pants and ridiculous boots was standing before her. The girl wanted to scream it out, to *glomp* him, but all she could do was to stare at him in amazement. But only seconds later a thought hit her. _This is a dream. Yes. It must be. That's the result of being too much of a FMA-fanatic, my mind is full of the manga… Wait, if this is a dream then it means I don't have to hold back! I can fangirl all I want! _

Edward Elric, on the other hand, was less pleased to meet her. Well, we can't blame him actually, who wouldn't find it suspicious if a girl suddenly pops out of nowhere?

"Brother," another amazing character appeared "who is that girl?" the vintage armor was more tremendous than the girl would've expect. But then again, it contrasted with our little bean… I mean, Edward. But in Ed's defense, he did grow a lot in the latest chapters (even though he didn't seem to notice himself). _Oh my god this is so exciting! _

"That's what I want to know" The Elric brothers whispered to each other, without letting their guard down.

_Shall I try it..? Of course! I can't possibly let such an opportunity go, can I? _

"Man, your're small! You bean-sized little boy!" A wicked grin appeared on the girl's face while she was pointing to Ed.

Small… bean-sized… little…

"WHO THE HELL ARE YOU CALLING *_Insert Ed's rant, please_*…?!! YOU'RE GOING DOWN LITTLE GIRL!" It's surprising Ed's head didn't explode during his sudden (but expected) outburst.

***To be continued***


	2. Chapter 2

"Brother, calm down please." Somehow, it's even more entertaining seeing armored-Al trying to hold back his little 'big' brother (it didn't cost him much effort though). The girl couldn't help but smile while watching the two. _Now, if only colonel Mustang was here, I want to make the "you're useless (in the rain)" comment…_

"What's so funny?" Ed sounded irritated.

"Oh, I sure wish Winry was here."

Ed was even more irritated._ She's ignoring me… wait, wat? She knows…?_

"You know Winry?" Alphonse asked before his brother could.

"Sure I do! She's Ed's love-interest." The girl was clearly pointing to our Fullmetal Alchemist. And an evil grin showed on her face… she knew what was coming (she haven't read the manga over and over again for nothing, and she's quite up-to-date with the manga chapters too).

Edward Elric turned red, sweaty and was making funny faces… yes, he was clearly embarrassed and overreacting: "Sh…she…is…only…"

"Your childhood friend? Your automail-mechanic? Oh please, everyone who reads the manga knows better!" the girl ignored the confused Elric brother and continued: "_Next time I make you cry, you'll be crying tears of happiness!_ Sounds familiar doesn't it? You said that to Winry didn't you? Come on, denying it while it's so obvious. You agree with me Al, don't you?"

"Actually, I do…"

"AL!!! _You traitor_!!!"

"…But how do you know all those things? Who ARE you?"

Ed was ignored again and he wasn't too happy about it_. Al's siding with her, they're all picking on me_… It's funny, you could almost see mushrooms growing out of ed's head.

"Oh, sorry, I haven't introduced myself properly. My name is Yikie and you can say I know almost everything about you guys… well, not as much as Hiromu Arakawa of course."

"And who the hell is that Arakawa-guy?" Ed asked.

Yikie burst in to laughter while Ed and Al was looking confused at each other. He has no idea why his question was so laughable.

"She…she…" Yikie replied "…is a cow." Still laughing and weeping away the tears at the corners of her eye.

"Brother, do you think…?" Al whispered to Ed.

"Yes, she's definitely crazy." Ed concluded.


	3. Chapter 3

"So… you mean, you come from another world?" Alphonse Elric asked after a detailed explanation from 'the-girl-who-suddenly-pops-out-of-nowhere'.

"Yes, either that, or I'm dreaming."

"I think WE are the one who's suppose to be dreaming." Ed grumbled , "How'd you expect us to believe a story like THAT?"

"You don't believe me? Well, take a look at THIS!"

"A State Alchemist pocket watch." Al sounded surprisingly not-so-surprised. Well, after a strange girl, claiming to come from another world, suddenly appears and seems to know quite a lot about… well, _everything_… At that point, it'll take a lot more to surprise Al.

"It's the same as Edwa… Hey!" Ed grabbed the pocket watch from Yikie's hands and opened it. After a single glance at what's written in the watch his gold-coloured eyes widened.

"H-how…"

"Do you believe me now? What's written in the watch, is the same as yours…"

"It's not exactly the same." Ed looked serious.

"It's not my fault the first anime series is different from the manga." the girl protested (he's probably referring to the date on both their watches). _Ed sure looks sexy when he's being serious, the look in his eyes reminds me why he is my favourite character… and what's more fun than teasing your own favourite character? Hèhè._

"And now you're talking about things no one understands again!" Ed was losing his temper. But as a matter of fact, he _always_ loses his temper, so we can overlook that.

"Erm…" Al interrupted, "what are you two talking about? Ed, what's written in your watch?"

"Oh right, Alphonse don't know about it! Besides Ed, only Winry is suppose to know. It's you guys' dirty little secret."

"Brother, what have you been doing with Winry…? _Youngsters these days_.."

"Al! D-don't listen to a word she says! She's talking outer-space-language!! _And why are you sounding like an old grandpa?!!" _Ed's serious-face disappeared and made place for his weird yet funny expressions, "And you!"

"Who? Me?" Yikie looked a little astonished.

"Yes! YOU!"Ed responded displeasingly, "Why are you always bringing _her_ up?"

"Her… you mean Winry?" _Of course Ed meant Winry, _but seeing his expression change awkwardly when she mentioned Winry's name made Yikie smile.

"Winry!"

"Not you too, Al!!!"Ed gritted his teeth.

"Hey, Ed! Al!" A girl's voice called out the Elric brothers' name.

Ed turned around and looked bewildered at the girl with platinum blond hair standing before him.

"W-Winry! What are you doing here?!"_ Oh great, why'd she have to show up now? _Edward thought._ As if I'm not embarrassed enough already…_

"Why, you don't look happy to see m… Did you do something horrible to my precious automail again?!" When Winry said that to Ed, it didn't sound much like a question, but more like a threat.

"No! That's not it…! _And why do you have a wrench in your hand already?! You always carry those things around _?!" Ed panicked.

***To be continued***


	4. Chapter 4

"Yes, of course I do" Winry responded "because you're so rough with my crafty automail -my art-, I always have to be prepared to make reparations when visiting you. Apparently, you don't know how much work and effort it is to…"

"I do" Ed interrupted.

_Eh? _ Winry blinked.

"I do understand and… I'm thankful for it. I'm glad to see you again, Winry." Ed looked directly in her eyes, giving her a troubled yet gentle smile.

Winry blinked again, "I'm glad to see you again too, Ed" she, too, ended the sentence with a smile.

"Awww… aren't you two cute? Just hook up already! And Ed, can't you just say you've missed her?"

_Crap, I forgot that annoying, weird, crazy girl was here! _Ed's feeling awkward and irritated at the same time. For some reason, he's suddenly decided to recite the periodic table in order to escape reality, giving Winry and Yikie a déjà vu.

"Oh yeah, Al, who is this girl? A friend of yours? Ed has lost his senses and gone crazy, so no point at asking him now."

"Well, she…"

"No, I'll introduce myself. Hi, Winry, I've always wanted to meet you! My name is…"

****

"You know, I also read a lot of fanfics." Yikie suddenly said when Winry was checking up Ed's automail.

"Fanfics?" Ed didn't feel like asking _what's that _for the I-lost-count-how-many time.

"Yeah, and some of them are about you and Roy Mustang."

"About me and the colone…?" Ed didn't finish his sentence, a chill ran over his spine because the look on that girl's eyes and huge grin on her face were just too scary, wicked and evil.

Yikie began murmuring something in Ed's ear. He turned pale during the process and made a disgust expression.

Al and Winry looked at each other, wondering what they were talking about, when they suddenly heard Ed scream…

"NO! THAT'S A LIE! I DON'T BELIEVE IT! How could they do this to me?!! How could HE do THAT to ME?! THAT'S DISGUSTING!!!"

"Hey!" Yikie shouted, "I'm not finished yet! Then Roy XXXXX you and you also XXXXX him and you two XXXXX in XXXXX while you were shouting XXXXX!!!"

Winry's face was turning red and if Al wasn't a soul-in-an-armor, his face would too. But the two childhood friends pretended as if they didn't hear a word Yikie was shouting –very loud-.

Ed on the other hand… well, let us just say he's mentally scarred for life now.

***To be continued***


	5. Chapter 5

"Oh, man" Ed sighed, "If I see the colonel's face now, I'll feel sick for sure." The Fullmetal Alchemist was ordered to head back to central. They were on their way, sitting in the train for another few hours.

"Brother," Al began, "you're always saying the colonel's face makes you sick."

"But this time it's different!" _Oh, no… disturbing images were flashing before his eyes again…Aargh! THIS IS ALL HER FAULT! Yeah… that awful girl…_

"And more importantly, " Ed's shifty eyes looked displeasingly towards the girl who's sitting next to Winry, "WHY'D **SHE** HAVE TO COME WITH US?! _And don't you ignore me!_"

The girls were chatting so they pretended Ed to be air.

"Well, if what Yikie-san said was true, then it means she has nowhere else to go, we couldn't leave her behind could we, big brother?"

"Al, your picking-up-street-cats-disease has come too far!"

"_It's not a disease! Big brother, you're evil! Evil!!!"_

"_WHA-?!"_

_****_

"Fullmetal, what's with the happy expression?" The Flame Alchemist aka colonel Roy Mustang aka womanizer aka so-meant-to-be-with-Riza, was standing before them.

Yikie couldn't be more happier. By the way, I don't know how you see it Roy, but our little shrimp had everything _but_ a 'happy' expression on his face.

"You know, out of ALL people I didn't expect YOU to come and pick us up, colo…"

"Roy Mustang! The Flame Alchemist!"

_This girl is always interrupting me!! _Ed was clearly pissed, but he expected the annoying girl to scare the colonel with her 'stories called fanfiction' like she did with him, so he was willing to let this go…

"… You know, I totally support your vision as ___Führer__, _miniskirts are much more fun to wear than regular uniforms and..."

"Fullmetal, I don't know who this girl is and when she had heard of my brilliant idea, but I like her." The colonel said to Ed while Yikie was ranting and talking about things they could barely understand.

"… yeah, so even though you're **TOTALLY USELESS** when it rains, you're always the second most popular character in FMA in popularity polls." Yikie finally said.

"On, second thought, I don't like her at all', the colonel changed his mind, "Fullmetal, she's annoying as hell."

"Colonel," Ed sighed, "I'd never thought I would say this… but I totally agree with you on this one."


	6. Chapter 6

"I refuse."

"What did you say?"

"I don't want to."

"What do you mean _you don't want to_? I am the one who's paying for the stay at the hotel, so if you don't want to share a room with Winry, you can sleep on the streets then!" Ed had always been a short-tempered person, but Yikie just made it worse.

"Now, calm down you two" Winry said, "Yikie, there's only two (twin) rooms left so…"

"I want to share it with Al," Yikie smiled.

"Eh?"

"I hope you don't get the wrong idea Winry! You're one of my favourite characters (and I like the fact you always throws wrenches at Ed), but I want to stay with Alphonse for the night. I want to talk to him… _I know he can't sleep_." The girl said sincerely.

Ed, Al and Winry didn't know what to say, they never expected that and were actually quite moved.

_Maybe…_ Edward Elric thought, _she isn't all that bad_.

"Which means…" Yikie smirked, "… you have to share a room with Winry..." she said not-so-sincerely while looking at Ed.

"WHAT?!!"

_I take it back, this girl is the worse!! _

***

"Erm… Yikie-san?"

"Yes, Al?"

"What are you doing?"

"I'm making a little hole. The walls here, which separates the rooms, are actually very thin.

"Oh, is that so… wait, No! That's not right! You can't do that!"

"But, " Yikie pouted, "you can fix it later on with alchemy, right?"

"Y-yes… but, what are you making that for?" Al asked a little troubled.

"…" Yikie paused a little.

Then she made a sinister facial expression with a huge grin (Al could swear her eyes were glowing)… Al knew that expression,it reminded him of a certain someone whom he calls his older brother:

"We're going to spy on the two lovebirds in the room next to us."


	7. Chapter 7

It wasn't the first time he and Winry were alone together, but this time he was tricked by _that girl_, the devil herself. She had it all planned out. True, he has to admit that, secretly, he wasn't too unhappy about the fact he and Winry share the same hotel room. But still… without Al around, somehow, he felt awkward… as if someone was spying on him

_(oh Ed, you couldn't be more right…)_

Is Ed thinking too much?

_(No, not at all. There is a certain fangirl watching your movements behind a certain wall, and if she could, she'll be happy to videotape everything too!)_

_Probably,_ Ed decided after a second, because his childhood friend didn't seem uncomfortable at all.

"Take off your pants" Winry suddenly said.

"EH…?!" _What did she say? _Ed became all nervous again and his voice was more high-pitched than it used to be, "W-Winry…wha…y-you… w-we……shouldn't…do that… I mean, n-now it's…"

"Huh? What are you talking about?" Winry frowned her eyebrows, "hurry up, I have to check up your automail leg too. I only got the chance to see your arm earlier, remember?"

"Oh… yeah. Right, of course." _What the hell was I thinking?! Winry always strips me before __**all those people**__ either to repair or to show off the automail limbs she made me. It's not such a big deal to take off my pants now, is it?_

_All those people… _Right, usually Winry works on his automail with other people around (like Al for example), but now they're –_alone-… _in a hotel room no less!

"Hmm, judging by his facial expressions, Ed's struggling with his hormones" Yikie said, more to herself than to Al, "but hey, in his defense, Ed's a healthy boy and now he's alone in a room with a pretty girl… Man! Kiss her already!" The girl pleaded with her forehead pressed against the wall and eyes staring intensely through the holes she made earlier.

Al had already given up the attempts to stop Yikie from such an immoral act, because the stubborn girl just wouldn't listen and… secretly Al also wanted to know how things would turn out between his brother and childhood friend. Even Al thought Ed's been in denial for too long.

****

"Does it hurt?" Winry looked a little worried at Edward.

"Huh? No, not at all." Ed was a little surprised, _Winry looks kind of cute like that_, he thought.

"Then, is there something on your mind?"

"E-erm…" Ed stuttered. _Yes, you! Suddenly looking all cute and stuff... And the fact that we're alone in the same room. It's driving me crazy!_

"…No, not really." Ed lied.

"Oh, I thought the whole Yikie-situation is giving you a hard time, I guess I was worried for nothing then."

_Oh yeah_, Ed remembered whose fault is was he was in this awkward situation and having such a hard time...

"Of course I'm having a hard time thanks to her! That girl's been nothing more than trouble ever since the moment she appeared. I have yet to find a way to get rid of her!"

"HOW DARE YOU EDWARD ELRIC! BADMOUTHING ABOUT ME! _And I was only trying to help too!_"

_Not so loud! _Al was trying to say, but it was already too late…

****

"YOU TWO WERE SPYING ON US ALL THAT TIME?!! _You too Al? Unbelievable_!" Ed didn't know if he should be embarrassed or angry when he confronted the two.

"What's the big deal? You didn't plan to do something naughty with Winry, did you?" Yikie said teasingly with a smirk on her face.

And patiently waited for Ed's outburst to hide his embarrassment…


	8. Chapter 8

"So you did!" Yikie gasped amusingly because Ed didn't answer her question immediately.

"NO I DIDN'T!!" Ed's face looked like a red, blown-up balloon… with an antenna attached to it.

"Be careful tonight, Winry. He might look like a shrimp, but he's actually a _perv._" _I might say this, but I would LOOOOOVE EdWin-moments._

"You don't have to worry, I have my wrenches with me. _I can embed them in his skull anytime._"

Yikie and Ed's automail mechanic whispered softly (but their words were still loud enough so Ed could hear them) to each other.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLING A SHRIM-…!?! And Win-! Why would I do something to y-y ?! YOU'RE UNCUTE AND UNSEX-…!!"

Before Ed could finish his declare, Winry demonstrated the fact that she could indeed embed a wrench in Ed's skull -anytime-.

****

"Embarrassing Ed (a few times)… check. Mocking Roy… check. What else can I do? The FMA world is surprisingly boring for a non-alchemist like me", complained Yikie, "and now I can't even spy on them anymore!"

"Maybe it's best you don't do anything reckless again, Yikie-san. Ed will only be more angry with you than he already is." Al said rationally.

"Puh, he already thinks I'm an annoying, obnoxious, wicked and crazy girl (_and somehow he's right_), so what difference will it make?" The girl asked in return.

"I don't think you're that bad," Al responded, "you're a lively girl with a lot spirit and you didn't actually do anything to harm us either."

"Why," Yikie blinked, "thanks Al… you're so nice. I'll be sure to marry you on the '_Marry Your favorite Character Online_'- website" she said with a huge smile.

"…"

_This girl is weirder than I thought…_


	9. Chapter 9

"Woah! This (fake) military pocket watch is awesome! With this, I don't even have to pay for my food (they'll send the bill to 'Edward Elric the State Alchemist')." Yikie said while examining her 'Funimation-licensed-toy'.

"I'm going to eat till that shrimp goes bankrupt… or even better, I'm going to abuse my power as a State Alchemist!"

Ed and Al went to see colonel Mustang for 'military business' and prohibited Yikie to tag along and asked Winry to keep an eye on her.

"You're not a State Alchemist," winry said jokingly, "and don't make me witness the day Ed finally decide to kill you. He was close to yesterday."

"I was only kidding!" Yikie laughed politely, "and speaking about yesterday… did Ed do something naughty to you last night?" she changed her tone remarkably.

"O-of course not!" Winry responded and looked at Yikie while frowning her eyebrows. Yikie was disappointed Winry didn't blush… but then again, she isn't that much of a '_blushy'_ person. But there were a few times Winry did blush in the manga, Yikie recalled, for example that time when…

"Say Winry"

"Yes?"

"Do you remember that time when Ed said that next time he makes you cry, you'll be crying tears of happiness?"

"Yes, yes I do. And what about it?"

"And that time, in the train, you've admitted to yourself that… HEY!! Ed, Al and…!!" Yikie stopped and stared dumbfounded at a rooftop where she saw the Fullmetal Alchemist and his armored brother chasing after a homunculus who looks like a guy… or a flat-chested girl for all that matter…

"ED! AL! ENVYYYYYYYY!!!" the fangirl then screamed.

"Huh?" The homunculus and –the quite shocked- Elric brothers looked her way.

In a split of a second the pale-white-skinned-cross dresser-wannabe (who's named after one of the seven sins) appeared before Yikie and Winry.

"Friends of yours, Fullmetal Shorty?" Envy grinned. A typical Envy-grin. Actually, Envy always seems to have only one wicked expression… a great one though.

Yikie heard Ed screaming something, but didn't really catch the meaning of his words as she's only focused on Envy, the homunculus she likes and hates so much.

"Shemale" she finally said to him…


	10. Chapter 10

"What-?!" Envy looked a little more than irritated.

"Cross dresser, transvestite, girly boy, genderless, gender queer…" Yikie was saying all this with a satisfied expression and a big smile.

"…that's what Ed over there's been calling you." She lied without any feelings of guilt.

Envy switched his pissed off-look from the girl to Ed whose running towards their direction.

"Oh and he also said something else… _what was it again? _Oh yeah… **UGLY**." Yikie said remarkably loud.

Envy's aura felt different when he heard the last word, it seemed like he had… killing intentions.

"Ya wanna kill Edward, heh?" The girl who provoked the homunculus smirked, "too bad he's a human sacrifice… unlike us, who are his DEAREST friends, especially the blond girl, she's his love interest…"

"WHA-?!" –_the hell are you saying! _Ed planned to shout.

"… if something happens to us – to _her_- Ed would be emotionally hurt, though… you know the Ed who called you UGLY." Yikie finished her sentence an tried to hide her amused undertone.

"Well, isn't that a shame, Fullmetal Shrimp?!" Envy was obviously angry, but still had a creepy smirk on his face while saying this.

"WHO ARE YOU CALLN- Wait… What are you doi-?!"

"Winry!" Al shouted.

"LET HER GO BASTARD! DON'T YOU DARE TO TOUCH HER!!!" It was Ed's turn to be furious… still, you could hear he was panicking.

"Heeeh, so she is indeed your weak point, shorty." Envy took a glance at Winry, whom he held hostage, and was clearly amused and somehow a little impressed by the angry yet concerned look on Ed's face.

"What have you done? This time you've gone too far." Al was mad at Yikie and he had the right to be… And Ed was too busy focusing on Envy and Winry to even notice the girl was suddenly standing next to him and Al.

"I know what I'm doing!" Yikie and protested and pouted her lips.

"I'm bored. Let's play hide and seek..." Envy looked at the trio.

"Ed! Al! I-" Winry couldn't finish her words.

"…And I'm taking her with me."

"ENVY!!!" Ed screamed, but the homunculus was already gone with Winry, "IF SOMETHING HAPPENS TO HER I'LL BE SURE TO RIPP OFF YOUR SORRY ASS YOU BASTARD!!"


	11. Chapter 11

A/N: I'm SO SORRY for the late update, but I've got a lot of schoolwork lately...and I'm lazy xD...

but I promise, if my fanfic recieves more reviews and attracts new readers, I'll update as soon as possible ^^'!

* * *

"HEY!! STOP YOU &#*ùè§ &é&*!!!!" Ed screamed his longs out (as if Envy really would stop) while running after the homunculus.

_Man, the alchemist shorty sure swears a lot._ Envy thought while trying to get rid of Ed.

"Let me go! Let. Me. Go! You..!!"

Winry wasn't planning to play the hostage who does nothing and only waits for Ed to rescue her (the automail mechanic is way too cool for that)...

*KLANG*

"OUCH! YOU BITCH THAT HURTS!!"

Envy became more pissed than he already was and threw the wrench out of Winry's hands. He carried the girl by her waist with his right arm (a little inconvenient for running though).

***

"AL! Alphonse… I… can't…follow…anymore… _can't breathe_!!" Physical education was never Yikie's best subject at school and she'd never run this much in her life before.

"You should have thought about that before you did something like that… _oh no we're losing them!_"

Al was clearly still mad at the girl and it irritated Yikie. It wasn't like him to stay angry like that.

"I'm sorry.." she said.

The vintage armor slowed down a little and slightly turned his head to look at the girl behind him.

"..And I really mean it! I… Ouch…" Yikie tripped and fell on her knees.

"It huuuurts!!!" She cried.

*Sigh*

Alphonse lifted Yikie with both his arms and started carrying the girl while continuing their (his) running.

_He's the kind Alphonse we know after all._ She thought.

"Oh by the way," Yikie interrupted her own thoughts, " I take back my apologize. I can't help it that Envy is such a whiny little brat who can't take a joke, so technically, I'm not at fault… You're not going to drop me, are you?"

"…" Alphonse sighed again.

***

"Where is this place?" _That damn homunculus_… _I can't see a thing_…

Ed found himself in a dark, abandoned building with an unpleasant environment.

"Brother!"

"Al! And… _you_." Ed's mood went from relieved to downhill and looked at Yikie with shifty eyes.

"Hi, Ed. What's with the unhappy face?" Yikie faked her politeness and grinned.

"Unhappy?!! Well I wonder how tha-"

"And more importantly…" Yikie didn't let Ed finish what he was about to say (she tends to do that a lot), "… why are there two Winry's?"

"Huh?!!"

Ed and Al looked at the direction Yikie was pointing. And indeed, they saw Winry tied up in a chair and next to her… another Winry who's also tied up in a chair…

_Ow, this is gonna be fun_… Yikie didn't dare to say it out loud…


	12. Chapter 12

"This. Is. Al. YOUR fault!" Ed glared at the direction of Yikie who's trying to look as innocent as she could.

"I'm wondering…" the state alchemist continued.

"Wondering what?" his brother asked.

"I'm wondering if I should hit her with my right automail arm (which will hurt a lot), or with my left (that could feel the sensation of the punch)..."

"Brother, you mustn't hit a girl…"Al responded with an imaginary sweat drop.

"Ahum, I think you should first focus on the two Winry's… you know, there's like _two_ of them. Like a pair, identical twin!" A big smile appeared on the girl's face and her eyes sparkled.

_She's enjoying this._ The Elric brothers both thought.

***

"What was the occupation of your parents? " Al asked Winry A.

"They were doctors." Winry A answered correctly.

Untill now, Winry A and Winry B both answered all the questions of Ed and Al correctly.

"Ok, where and with whom do you liv…?" for the 503th time, Yikie didn't let Ed finish what was supposed to come out of his mouth.

"These questions are plain booooring and only a tad less obvious than the answers they were suppose to give."

"Do YOU have a better idea then?" Ed said impatiently towards the girl who annoys the hell out of him.

"You have to make the questions more... personal," Yikie looked at Ed, "like her first kiss and stuff." the girl was satisfied with the troubled look on Ed's face upon hearing the last part of what she was saying. "But it's not like I know that kind of thing," she continued, "maybe (=most likely) she has yet to receive her first kiss…"

The oldest Elric brother was clearly reassured by her words.

"…from you of course."

"WHA-?!" Ed's eyes nearly popped out and he never knew his chin could reach the ground while standing up.

"Yes, I have a plan, but for my plan to succeed, you have to kiss both of them (Winry!A AND Winry!B) OR get rid of both of them. To kiss or to kill, the decision is up to you."


	13. Chapter 13

"There is _no way _I'm kissing either of them!" Ed said before he gave the suggestion any thought.

"To kill, then?" The girl playfully expressed.

"OF COURSE NOT!"

"Why would a kiss help in the first place?" Al asked sensibly.

"I have my own reasons… " Yikie smirked – _yes, of course she has her reasons, and one of them is to satisfy her fangirlish needs_.

"Brother, why don't you ask them something about Automail? You know Winry, she's…"

"The problem is that I, myself, despite having two Automail limbs for quite some time, know relatively little about the technical aspects of those things. And if Envy can answer questions about the childhood of Winry (which we asked), then he can easily make stuff up about artificial limbs." Edward said calmly, but his facial expression betrayed his concern and irritation.

And the two brothers discussed while a bored Yikie was half listening and the girl finally tried:

"Have you forgotten I know practically everything about you and this world? Listen to me! I can help!"

The Elric brothers paused for a second or two. She got a point. But then again, SHE was the very first reason they got in this mess in the first place. They looked at each other and Ed finally managed to squeeze out while avoiding any eye contact:

"Ok. I…I'll do it." It's not like him to give in that easily.

"You will do what? Kill them?" The fangirl asked superfluously, no doubt she knows what Ed meant, but that doesn't mean she didn't want to hear him say it out loud.

"K-k…kiss. I'll KISS her!" Embarrassed is an understatement in Ed's case, "if that's is what it takes to save Winry", the little alchemist quickly added.

_Yeah right, _Yikie thought pleasantly and failing to hide her amusement for this situation:

"Her? You mean them!_ Fake Winry aka Envy too, you know"_

Her words hit Edward Elric as a slap on the face. Yeah, he forgot about the homunculus for a second when focusing having to take his childhood friend's first kiss. But before he could say anything about that the two Winry protested:

"I'm not kissing anybody" they both respectively expressed.


	14. Chapter 14

"Ed, you idiot!"

"It's me! You fool!

"I am Winry!"

"Don't you recognize me?"

"Al! Ed!"

"Ed! Al!"

As if the two identical voices weren't confusing and annoying enough, Yikie decided to add even more annoyance to the two brothers by protesting in between:

"I thought you said you'd kiss her! Why don't you kiss her? KISS HER ALREADY!"

"OH, SHUT UP ALREADY!!" Edward Elric yelled, not really sure to whom that sentence was addressed.

He seemed more than close to an actual outburst, something Alphonse, Yikie and the two Winries were expecting from him at that moment.

But instead, he stepped towards to the identical, tied up girls with a determined expression on his face and pressed his lips to their foreheads.

Leaving the two Automail engineers astonished and Yikie and Al wordless for a moment.

"Now what?" Ed demanded looking to the girl who told him to kiss the hostages. The determination on his face has faded immediately after his lips touched the forehead of Winry and her clone, but he tried to keep a stern expression in order to hide is embarrassment.

"Er… now their lips?" The fangirl said teasingly.

"I'm serious. I've kissed them. Now what? Who is the real Winry?" The older Elric brother looked deadly serious.

"You call that a kiss?" Yikie provoked him, _although she had to admit it was kind of cute… maybe she'll find some fanart about this_, "I am serious too. On. The. Lips. THEN I will tell you who's the real Winry… maybe."

Alphonse secretly found this all highly entertaining, even though he could almost hear his older brother thoughts towards the little girl.

_Do not strangle her. Do not strangle her. ..Her…Strangle her! Strangle that spawn of the devil now! _

Edward was boiling up inside.

But then, for some reason, he turned to the two –still identical- Winries and as if it just crossed the Fullmetal Alchemist's mind that they were still tied up, he began untying one of them and suddenly, to everyone's surprise, confessed with a softened expression:

"I'm sorry Winry,"

he looked right in her blue eyes as he was loosening the rope,

"I love you."

----------to be continued definitely----------


	15. Chapter 15

This time, it was the Fullmetal Alchemist-**fan** to get confused.

Of all the scenarios in Yikie's mind how a confession like that could've happened, this was not one of them. And how exactly did it happen? One moment Edward Elric was boiling with anger and trying to figure out who is the real Winry, and in less than a split of a second, without any explanation, he'd figured out who's the real one –or so it seemed- and confessing to her?

"… I know I've told you before, yesterday in the hotel room after I scolded Al and that weird and dreadful girl for spying on us…"

Yikie opened her mouth to say something but was stopped by Alphonse.

"...but you haven't give me an answer about how you feel yet, what do you say, Winry?" Ed said with his eyes fixed on the blond-haired girl.

"I…Of course I-" The girl's voice went missing the moment she saw this wicked grin appearing on Edward Elric's face._ Oh SHI- A trap!_

But it was too late, Ed transmuted the chair where _fake!Winry_ was sitting on and the rope together so it tied it up more. But it was no use, Envy was too strong and freed himself in no time while transforming back to his -questionably- male appearance.

"Damn, I can't believe I fell for that little talk," the homunculus said while fighting and running again from the Elric brothers.

"Yeah, otherwise it'll took Fullmetal Shorty here forever to find out, given his limited intelligence." Yikie happily mocked Ed when she went to untie the real Winry.

"WHA-?! You littl-" A punch hit Edward's face.

"Brother!" "Ed!" cried Al and Winry respectively.

Envy escaped.

Well, that's what happens when you don't concentrate while fighting, Yikie thought.

***

"I didn't mean anything by it" Ed spoke up suddenly, without looking at anyone particularly, "y-you know, when I told Env-"

"Yes, we know, that whole _love confession-thing _was just your plan to unmask Envy, actually quite clever of you." Yikie talked in the name for everyone.

"I wasn't talking to you," Hissed Edward, getting praised by _that girl _actually made him even more uncomfortable and a chill ran through his spine. "And I knew he was fake, the hotel room-talk was just to make sure my assumptions were right.

"You weren't talking to anyone." Yikie expressed, "and _yeah riiiiight_…"

"It's true!"

"How did you know then?" This time, it was Winry who asked a question.

Ed didn't gave her the answer and just looked away grumbling.

Because, how exactly could he tell her he'd figured it out while kissing their foreheads and noticed Envy lacking that pleasant smell Winry has, without seeming suspicious?

-------------------------------------To be continued-------------------------------------------


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